Benchwarmers, rookies, and seasoned sluggers alike – get ready for some side-splitting baseball humor! Whether you’re a die-hard fan who never misses a moment of America’s favorite pastime or a fair-weather enthusiast who just likes the snacks, there’s one thing we can all agree on: baseball is a goldmine for laughs.
Here’s a super fun fact to get you in the swing of things – The record for the longest home run ever hit in a major league game is believed to be held by Mickey Mantle, who hit a staggering 565-foot homer in 1953!
Pretty incredible, right? Now that you’re warmed up with that grand slam of a fact, get ready to crack up with a lineup of jokes that are as solid as a line drive and guaranteed to give you a grand slam of giggles.
So, grab your glove and sharpen your wit, because we’re about to throw a few curveballs that will knock you out with laughter!
Table of the Funniest Baseball Jokes
1. Why are baseball players such bad bowlers?
Because they always throw strikes!
2. Why do baseball pitchers stay away from diamonds?
Because they don’t want to throw stones!
3. How do baseball players keep in touch with their friends?
They “catch” up occasionally!
4. Why did the baseball player bring rope to the game?
He wanted to tie the score!
5. What’s a baseball player’s favorite type of music?
Swing!
6. Why are frogs good outfielders?
Because they’re always catching flies!
7. What did the baseball glove say to the ball?
“You’re a catch!”
8. Why did the baseball team go to the bakery?
They needed a good batter!
9. What do you call a baseball player who throws a tantrum?
A base stealer… of attention!
10. What kind of pancakes do baseball players love?
Batter cakes!
11. Why did the baseball player get arrested?
For stealing second base!
12. How is a baseball team similar to a pancake?
They both need a good flip!
13. Why was the baseball player such a great musician?
He had perfect pitch!
14. What do pitchers and magicians have in common?
They both know how to throw strikes!
15. Why do baseball players rarely get into fights?
Because they always stay in their strike zone!
16. How do baseball players avoid traffic jams?
They take the designated hitter lane!
17. Why was the Cinderella baseball team so bad?
They always ran away from the ball!
18. Why don’t orcas play baseball?
Because they don’t like to bat underwater!
19. Why don’t skeletons play baseball?
They don’t have the guts!
20. Why did the baseball team hire a gardener?
To help with their “pitch”!
21. How does a baseball player freshen their breath before the game?
With a base-mint!
22. What did the umpire say to the chicken that crossed the field?
It’s foul!
23. Why are baseball games at night always so cool?
Because there are fans everywhere!
24. What’s a baseball player’s least favorite part of the park?
The foul territory!
25. Why did the baseball team bring string to practice?
They wanted to tie up the game!
26. Why did the tomato turn red during the baseball game?
It saw the ballpark mustard!
27. What do you call a baby baseball team?
A little league of their own!
28. What’s the difference between a pickpocket and a baseball umpire?
One steals watches, the other watches steals.
29. What’s harder to catch the faster you run?
Your breath, not a fly ball!
30. Why did the baseball player make a good cake?
Because he knew how to work the batter!
31. Why did the coach sit on the cake?
He wanted to step up his batting order!
32. Why did the fish avoid going to the baseball game?
He didn’t want to get caught by a line drive!
33. Why are ghosts bad at baseball?
They’re always scared to face strikes!
34. Why don’t mummies play baseball?
Because they’re wrapped up in other stuff!
35. Why did the baseball team go to the party?
They wanted to steal the spotlight!
36. What position do electricians play on a baseball team?
Short circuit-stop!
37. Why did the accountant start playing baseball?
He wanted to balance the field!
38. What do you get when you cross a baseball player and a vampire?
A bat that really sucks!
39. Why was the baseball field so quiet?
Everyone had gone home-plate!
40. Why did the doughnut make it to the Hall of Fame?
It had the most “rings” at every home run!
41. What’s a baseball player’s favorite rose?
A “base-rose!”
42. What’s a baseball player’s favorite part of a movie?
The pitch!
43. Why was the baseball pitcher great at storytelling?
Because he always threw the plot twist!
44. What’s a baseball player’s favorite kind of footwear?
Baseball cleats!
45. Why did the baseball player go to art school?
He wanted to learn how to draw walks!
46. What’s worse than getting hit by a pitch?
Getting told you’ll play in mittens!
47. How’s a baseball player like a spider?
They’re good at catching things in webs!
48. Why did the baseball player bring a pencil to the game?
So he could draw some strikes!
49. How do baseball players keep their hair in place?
They use “baseball” caps of course!
50. Why was the baseball player such a smooth talker?
Because he’d mastered his curve!
51. Why was baseball the safest sport for a cake?
Because it only takes one good batter to make it stand out!
52. Why do baseball players love math during the game?
They love to add up their hits!
53. Why did the baseball team stop using their opera singer?
She kept hitting the wrong pitches.
54. What kind of player hits the best fast food?
A slugger!
55. Why was the baseball team great in history class?
They knew all about past plates!
56. What did the outfielder say when he made an amazing catch?
“I glove this game!”
57. How do you recognize a baseball player’s house key?
It opens home plate!
58. Why was the baseball bat happy?
Because it had a real swingin’ time at the game!
59. What did the first base say when second base made an error?
“Throw me a line, would ya?”
60. Why was the baseball player always tired?
He ran home every night!
61. Why are baseball games so noisy?
Because all the fans are screaming!
62. Why was the coach so happy with his players?
They were outstanding in the field!
63. Why did the baseball player bring an ouija board to the game?
To get extra spirit in the team!
64. What’s a cat’s favorite baseball position?
Purr-fect pitch catcher!
65. Why did the baseball team bring a map on the field?
To track their course to victory!
66. Why did the player quit the circus to join a baseball team?
Because he wanted to juggle wins instead!
67. What’s a vampire’s go-to baseball move?
Batting practice, of course.
68. What’s a bee’s favorite part during the game?
Buzzing off between innings!
69. Why don’t crabs play baseball?
Because they always pinch hit!
70. Why are mathematicians bad at baseball?
They can never figure “base”-ics!
71. What’s a tree’s least favorite part of a baseball game?
When it’s caught in a pickle!
72. Why did the batter get promoted?
He always knew how to step up to the plate!
73. Why did the coach file a police report?
His team got robbed… at home plate!
74. What’s the difference between a frog and a baseball team?
One catches flies with its tongue, the other with a glove!
75. Why did the flower refuse to play baseball?
It was afraid of getting thrown out at home!
76. What do baseball and baking have in common?
They both “whip” up something good!
77. Why was the baseball field jealous of the soccer field?
Because they had more corner kicks!
78. Why did the scarecrow start playing baseball?
He was outstanding in his field!
79. What is a baseball player’s favorite candy?
A pitch-perfect gumball!
80. Why did the stadium get so warm?
Because all the fans left!
81. Why are baseball cards so famous?
They’re always in the major leagues!
82. What did the ball say when leaving the field?
“I’ve had a ball!”
83. Why are baseball pitchers great at public speaking?
They know how to command a presence from the mound.
84. What’s the plumber’s favorite baseball position?
Closer, he’s always wrapping up the game!
85. Why did the pitcher carry an umbrella?
Just in case of a pop fly!
86. What do you get if you cross a baseball field with a frozen treat?
A double scoop!
87. Why did the security guard join the baseball team?
So he could be great at catching crooks!
88. Why did the flashlight hate baseball?
It was tired of all the spotlight!
Hit a home run! Share the laughs!
Baseball might be serious business on the field, but off the diamond, everyone loves some cracking baseball jokes. Did these jokes knock it out of the park for you? If so, go ahead and share them with your buddies, teammates, or even your coach! Bookmark JokeandPun.com, and make sure you come back for more hit-worthy humor that will keep everyone in stitches.
