Dark humor isn’t for everyone, but for those who enjoy an edgy laugh, it can be a source of endless amusement. Today,we’ve compiled a list of dark humor jokes that are sure to tickle your funny bone.
From twisted puns to morbid one-liners,these jokes aren’t for the faint of heart. So, if you’re ready to embrace some black comedy and have a good laugh, read on and enjoy!
But do proceed with caution! The humor within this article operates on a different wavelength. Expect twisted punchlines,uncomfortable scenarios, and a disregard for the cheerfully conventional.
Table of the Darkest Dark Humor Jokes
1. Why don’t graveyards ever get overcrowded?
People are just dying to get in.
2. I’m not saying I hate you, but I would unplug your life support to charge my phone.
3. My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.
4. Why are friends a lot like snow?
If you pee on them, they disappear.
5. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the stomach for it.
6. I’ll never forget my grandpa’s last words before he kicked the bucket. He said:
“Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”
7. Why do vampires always seem sick?
Because they’re always coffin.
8. I wasn’t close to my father when he died. Which is lucky because he stepped on a landmine.
9. Why is there air conditioning in hospitals?
To keep the vegetables fresh and cool.
10. My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
11. What’s the last thing that goes through a bug’s mind when it hits a windshield?
Its butt.
12. Why did the man with one hand cross the road?
To get to the secondhand shop.
13. What’s the best part about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
14. What’s the difference between a well-dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bike?
Attire.
15. If at first, you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.
16. What do you call a nun in a wheelchair?
Virgin mobile.
18. Why do morgues have fences around them?
Because people are dying to get in.
19. What’s the difference between a hippie chick and a hockey player?
A hockey player showers after three periods.
20. What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a Rottweiler?
Just the Rottweiler.
21. How do you annoy your girlfriend during foreplay?
Call her and tell her about it.
22. Why do pills work?
Because they’re white.
23. What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A bus full of children.
24. What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A rip-off.
25. Why do grave diggers never get promotions?
They’re always buried in their work.
26. Why don’t you ever see ghosts hiding in trees?
Because they’re afraid of the bark.
27. What’s red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.
28. How can you tell if your wife is dead?
The sex is the same, but the dishes start piling up.
29. Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
Because he was hit by a bus.
30. What’s the difference between onions and babies?
I don’t cry when I chop up babies.
31. Why do painters always fall for their models?
Because they love them with every stroke.
32. What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?
The Holocaust.
33. Why do orphans like playing tennis?
It’s the only love they get.
34. What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?
You can unscrew a lightbulb.
35. Why did the girl fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
36. Why do shower heads have eleven holes?
Because Jews have ten fingers.
37. What’s black and screams?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.
38. How do you make a plumber cry?
Kill his family.
39. What’s the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
40. How do you get 100 babies into a bucket?
With a blender.
41. How do you get them out again?
Tortilla chips.
42. What’s the difference between a baby and a dart board?
Dart boards don’t bleed.
43. What’s invisible and smells like carrots?
Bunny farts.
44. What’s blue and doesn’t fit?
A dead epileptic.
Do You Have Any Dark Humor Jokes?
There you have it, dark humor jokes that will have you laughing out loud (that is, if you have a dark sense of humor). Share these jokes with your friends and family who appreciate a good laugh that’s a little bit twisted.
And don’t forget to subscribe to our newsletter for more hilarious jokes and puns delivered straight to your inbox. Laughter is the best medicine, so spread the joy and share these dark humor jokes with everyone you know!
