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Home»Jokes»70 Hilarious Blue Balls Jokes That Will Have You Rolling
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70 Hilarious Blue Balls Jokes That Will Have You Rolling

These jokes are so good, you'll laugh until you're blue in the face!
Ryan CortezBy Ryan Cortez10 Mins Read
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Blue Balls Jokes That Will Have You Rolling
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Laughter truly is the best medicine, and what better way to lighten up your day than with some hilarious blue balls jokes? Now, don’t let the name fool you—it’s all in good fun! These cheeky jokes touch on a wide variety of topics, all cleverly related to this tongue-in-cheek phrase.

And here’s a fun fact to kick things off: the phenomenon of “blue balls” is based on an actual physical experience, though it’s usually less severe—and more comical—than people make it sound. So, get ready to turn your day from “meh” to “hilarious” with some side-splitting, eye-twitching humor!

From puns to punchlines, these jokes will have you and your friends sharing them around immediately. Ready to giggle? Let’s dive into this humor-rich collection!

Table of the Funniest Blue Balls Jokes

  • 1. Why did the basketball player get blue balls?
  • 2. What’s worse: finding out your car is out of gas, or getting blue balls?
  • 3. Why do squirrels rarely get blue balls?
  • 4. What do you call a mall Santa who gets blue balls during the holidays?
  • 5. Why don’t blue balls attend school?
  • 6. What’s the favorite sport of someone with blue balls?
  • 7. How do blue balls and traffic jams relate?
  • 8. Why don’t scientists study blue balls?
  • 9. What’s a pirate’s solution for blue balls?
  • 10. What’s the only thing scarier than Monday morning?
  • 11. Why did the magician with blue balls quit his career?
  • 12. What do you call a snowman with blue balls?
  • 13. How do you make a golfer with blue balls happier?
  • 14. Why don’t knights in shining armor ever suffer from blue balls?
  • 15. What’s the difference between bad Wi-Fi and blue balls?
  • 16. How do you cheer up someone with blue balls?
  • 17. Why did the artist say “no” to blue balls?
  • 18. What was the referee’s response when the soccer player got blue balls?
  • 19. Why don’t astronauts get blue balls?
  • 20. Why are cowboys immune to blue balls?
  • 21. How did the marathon runner avoid blue balls?
  • 22. Why did the comedian get blue balls?
  • 23. What did the farmer say when he got blue balls?
  • 24. What’s the best way to describe a juggler with blue balls?
  • 25. Why is blue balls like an old phone?
  • 26. What’s a gamer’s favorite power-up for blue balls?
  • 27. Why don’t bakers fear blue balls?
  • 28. What did the mountain climber say when experiencing blue balls?
  • 29. How do you deal with blue balls at a party?
  • 30. Why don’t magicians reveal their tricks or have blue balls?
  • 31. What’s the weather report on blue balls?
  • 32. Why don’t blue balls go camping?
  • 33. What did the woodworker say about his blue balls?
  • 34. How do you annoy a fisherman?
  • 35. What’s the cure for blue balls on a road trip?
  • 36. Why did the musician write a song about blue balls?
  • 37. What superpower would someone with blue balls want?
  • 38. Why don’t skateboarders ever get blue balls?
  • 39. What’s worse for a basketball player: missing the last shot or getting blue balls after?
  • 40. How does a ninja deal with blue balls?
  • 41. Why did the boxer give up when he got blue balls?
  • 42. How do chefs avoid blue balls?
  • 43. What’s worse: having blue balls or losing at Monopoly?
  • 44. Why did the baker get blue balls?
  • 45. What’s a mathematician’s worst fear about blue balls?
  • 46. Why did the waiter hate serving blue balls?
  • 47. How did the pirate get rid of his blue balls?
  • 48. What’s worse for a sailor than a storm?
  • 49. What Olympic event do blue balls fear the most?
  • 50. Why did the actor say blue balls aren’t that bad?
  • 51. What’s a dentist’s response to a patient with blue balls?
  • 52. How do you drive fast without experiencing blue balls?
  • 53. Why did the mountaineer suffer blue balls?
  • 54. What did the racetrack announcer say about blue balls?
  • 55. Why do ballroom dancers never get blue balls?
  • 56. What’s a drummer’s least favorite beat?
  • 57. Why are people in the Arctic never worried about blue balls?
  • 58. Why do cactus collectors avoid blue balls?
  • 59. What’s the worst board game to play with blue balls?
  • 60. How does a runner avoid blue balls at the marathon?
  • 61. What’s the difference between a plumber and blue balls?
  • 62. How does a DJ handle blue balls?
  • 63. Why did the squirrel escape blue balls?
  • 64. How does a fireman handle blue balls?
  • 65. Why isn’t the surgeon worried about blue balls?
  • 66. How does a detective avoid blue balls?
  • 67. Why are magicians so talented at avoiding blue balls?
  • 68. Why’d the robot never get blue balls?
  • 69. What’s worse for a pizza maker than dropped dough?
  • 70. How do mathematicians solve blue balls?

1. Why did the basketball player get blue balls?

He couldn’t make it to the final shot!

2. What’s worse: finding out your car is out of gas, or getting blue balls?

At least with gas, you can get a refill quickly.

3. Why do squirrels rarely get blue balls?

Because they always nut in a hurry.

4. What do you call a mall Santa who gets blue balls during the holidays?

Kringle with a tingle.

5. Why don’t blue balls attend school?

They’re always stuck at recess.

6. What’s the favorite sport of someone with blue balls?

Soccer. Because they’re familiar with being kicked repeatedly.

7. How do blue balls and traffic jams relate?

Both leave you stuck with no exit in sight.

8. Why don’t scientists study blue balls?

It’s too stiff a subject matter!

9. What’s a pirate’s solution for blue balls?

Arrrr-tificial release!

10. What’s the only thing scarier than Monday morning?

A weekend ending with blue balls.

11. Why did the magician with blue balls quit his career?

He couldn’t master the trick to make them disappear.

12. What do you call a snowman with blue balls?

Frostbite—but in a different place.

13. How do you make a golfer with blue balls happier?

Tell him there’s always another hole to play.

14. Why don’t knights in shining armor ever suffer from blue balls?

Chivalry always saves the day!

15. What’s the difference between bad Wi-Fi and blue balls?

They both leave you buffering for something that never loads.

16. How do you cheer up someone with blue balls?

Tell them they’re just blue-tiful!

17. Why did the artist say “no” to blue balls?

Because his medium was pastel.

18. What was the referee’s response when the soccer player got blue balls?

Foul play on the field!

19. Why don’t astronauts get blue balls?

Because their missions always have the right kind of “lift-off.”

20. Why are cowboys immune to blue balls?

They always rope in what they’re after.

21. How did the marathon runner avoid blue balls?

He stayed focused on finishing the race—one step at a time.

22. Why did the comedian get blue balls?

Too many punchlines, not enough punches.

23. What did the farmer say when he got blue balls?

“Well, that’s one crop that didn’t harvest!”

24. What’s the best way to describe a juggler with blue balls?

They never seem to drop the act.

25. Why is blue balls like an old phone?

The connection is there, but nothing’s happening.

26. What’s a gamer’s favorite power-up for blue balls?

Restarting the level with more lives!

27. Why don’t bakers fear blue balls?

Because they know dough always rises.

28. What did the mountain climber say when experiencing blue balls?

“Guess I didn’t reach the summit this time.”

29. How do you deal with blue balls at a party?

Dance it off; the rhythm might help!

30. Why don’t magicians reveal their tricks or have blue balls?

A magician never leaves his audience waiting.

31. What’s the weather report on blue balls?

Cloudy skies with no chance of relief.

32. Why don’t blue balls go camping?

There’s too much pitch with no tent.

33. What did the woodworker say about his blue balls?

“Guess I didn’t finish the job today…”

34. How do you annoy a fisherman?

Leave him with blue gills and blue balls.

35. What’s the cure for blue balls on a road trip?

A detour that leads to a scenic view.

36. Why did the musician write a song about blue balls?

To capture the feel of missing the high note.

37. What superpower would someone with blue balls want?

Instant gratification, obviously!

38. Why don’t skateboarders ever get blue balls?

They’re always flipping out.

39. What’s worse for a basketball player: missing the last shot or getting blue balls after?

Either way, there’s no rebound.

40. How does a ninja deal with blue balls?

They remain silent but deadly…yet still unsatisfied.

41. Why did the boxer give up when he got blue balls?

Because he didn’t have the stamina for another round.

42. How do chefs avoid blue balls?

They always take their cooking to completion.

43. What’s worse: having blue balls or losing at Monopoly?

Finishing neither is enjoyable.

44. Why did the baker get blue balls?

Because the dough wasn’t the only thing left to rise.

45. What’s a mathematician’s worst fear about blue balls?

They can’t figure out the solution.

46. Why did the waiter hate serving blue balls?

The tips were always left short.

47. How did the pirate get rid of his blue balls?

The sea offered a lot of opportunities to plunder and release!

48. What’s worse for a sailor than a storm?

Sailing into a weekend of blue balls.

49. What Olympic event do blue balls fear the most?

The hurdles…they’re already tired of the obstacles.

50. Why did the actor say blue balls aren’t that bad?

His script was full of drama, so this was just another role to handle.

51. What’s a dentist’s response to a patient with blue balls?

“Sorry, I don’t handle those kinds of fillings.”

52. How do you drive fast without experiencing blue balls?

Hit the gas and never look back!

53. Why did the mountaineer suffer blue balls?

Because no peak was in sight.

54. What did the racetrack announcer say about blue balls?

“And it’s another round without a winner!”

55. Why do ballroom dancers never get blue balls?

They know how to tango out of any situation.

56. What’s a drummer’s least favorite beat?

The missed one that leads to blue balls.

57. Why are people in the Arctic never worried about blue balls?

Frozen, blue—what’s the difference up there?

58. Why do cactus collectors avoid blue balls?

They’re already surrounded by prickly situations!

59. What’s the worst board game to play with blue balls?

Waiting for Checkmate when you’re already checked out!

60. How does a runner avoid blue balls at the marathon?

By never looking back and going the extra mile!

61. What’s the difference between a plumber and blue balls?

One fixes leaks, the other suffers from them.

62. How does a DJ handle blue balls?

Spin a different track and hope for the drop.

63. Why did the squirrel escape blue balls?

Because hiding nuts is part of the job.

64. How does a fireman handle blue balls?

Keep calm, avoid the heat, and wait for the all-clear.

65. Why isn’t the surgeon worried about blue balls?

Every operation needs a full finish.

66. How does a detective avoid blue balls?

By solving the case before it gets too cold.

67. Why are magicians so talented at avoiding blue balls?

Because they always have a trick left.

68. Why’d the robot never get blue balls?

He’s too busy computing solutions.

69. What’s worse for a pizza maker than dropped dough?

Adding blue balls to that equation—no one’s eating tonight.

70. How do mathematicians solve blue balls?

They simply plot a new course and hope for a quicker solution!

Share these jokes and break the cycle of blue balls!

Was that enough laughter to cure the blues? If you thought these jokes were just what you needed, why not share them with your friends and keep the humor rolling? Bookmark this page for your next round of giggles—and don’t forget to browse for even more hilarious content on JokeandPun.com that is sure to brighten your day!

Disclaimer: The jokes and puns featured on this website are intended for entertainment purposes only. While we may include content from the public domain, we also hold copyright to the original material we’ve created. If you believe that any content on this website infringes upon your copyright, please contact us immediately. We take copyright infringement seriously and will take appropriate action. While we strive for accuracy, we cannot guarantee the absolute correctness or completeness of all information presented here. Reader discretion is advised. Enjoy the laughs!
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Ryan Cortez
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Ryan "Ry" Cortez is a rising gay comedian known for his sharp wit and honest humor. Raised in a religious Latino family in New Mexico, his comedy blends personal experiences with playful jabs at societal norms. Breaking into New York City's comedy scene, Ryan quickly gained a following for his relatable jokes about family, dating, and LGBTQ+ life. His performances have graced major comedy clubs and gone viral online. Beyond the stage, Ryan is a passionate advocate for LGBTQ+ rights and mental health awareness, using humor to connect and inspire.

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