Who said humor and relaxation couldn’t go hand in hand? Massages might be synonymous with serene music and scented candles, but they deserve a good chuckle too.
Did you know that a regular massage can help improve lymphatic drainage? This system is responsible for removing waste products and toxins from your body. By stimulating the lymphatic flow, a massage can help boost your immune system and promote overall health.
If you’re already imagining giggling while letting go of all that built-up tension, you’re on the right track. We’re here to tickle your funny bone with some of the best body massage jokes that will leave you uplifted and, perhaps, a bit more relaxed.
These body massage jokes and quips are perfect to share during a coffee break, to spice up a massage therapy session, or simply to lift your spirits on a dull day.
Without further ado, here are the most hilarious body massage jokes that are bound to give your smile muscles a workout:
Table of the Best Body Massage Jokes
1. Why did the masseuse bring a pencil to the session?
She wanted to draw out the tension!
2. What’s a masseuse’s favorite type of music?
Smooth jazz!
3. How do massage therapists stay cool?
They vent their frustrations!
4. Why was the massage therapist always calm?
Because they kneaded the stress out!
5. What did one muscle say to the other during the massage?
“You’re knot alone!”
6. Why did the skeleton skip his massage appointment?
He didn’t have the guts!
7. What do massage therapists do in their downtime?
They do some deep thinking!
8. How will you find a famous massage therapist?
By their relaxing reputation!
9. Why was the massage room always so busy?
It was booked solid!
10. Why do muscles love jokes?
Because they love a good knead!
11. Why did the orange take a massage session?
To get rid of its peelings!
12. How do you know if a massage therapist is an alien?
They speak extra-terracise!
13. What did the masseuse say to the stressed computer?
“Relax, you need a reboot!”
14. Why did the bakery and the massage parlor team up?
They both kneaded dough!
15. What do you call a massage that’s great and terrible?
A rub off!
16. Why don’t massage therapists play hide and seek?
Because good luck hiding from those knots!
17. What do you get if you massage a fish?
A koi and relax!
18. Why do yoga instructors also love to massage?
Because they’re always a little stretched out!
19. What’s a toddler’s favorite massage activity?
Tummy tickles!
20. Why do elephants avoid massages?
They don’t want anyone to feel down!
21. What does a grumpy cushion say?
“No pressure!”
22. Where do retired massage therapists live?
In Relaxationville!
23. Why did the tennis player get a massage?
To avoid getting deuce on the court!
24. What did the grape say after a good massage?
“I feel vin-tastic!”
25. Why did the melon book a massage session?
It just needed to de-stress!
26. How do you greet a massage therapist?
“You’re knot going to believe how good this feels!”
27. What do you call a massage therapist’s pet cat?
A kneady kitty!
28. Why are massages great therapy?
Because they make you rub out the wrinkles in life!
29. What’s a teacher’s favorite type of massage?
A-class relaxation!
30. Why don’t vampires get massages?
They’re too tense, they need a coffin!
31. How did the candle feel during the massage?
Melted and serene!
32. What’s a gardener’s favorite massage technique?
Pruning, of course!
33. What happened when the wolf went for a massage?
It howled with pleasure!
34. What’s a musician’s favorite massage method?
The rhythmic rub!
35. Why don’t plants go for massages?
Because they already feel grounded!
36. How did the cookie feel after a massage?
Crumbled but fantastic!
37. What’s a pirate’s favorite massage?
The Arrr-omatherapy!
38. What do you call a stressed-out spy?
A secret angster!
39. What makes a superhero’s massage special?
The kryptonite rubdown!
40. Why don’t ghosts go for massages?
They’re too spirited!
41. What’s the best massage for a robot?
A well-oiled machine rub!
42. Why did the coffee bean get a massage?
To get grounded!
43. How do you give a bird a massage?
With light feather strokes!
44. What did the drum say to the massage therapist?
Beat that stress out!
45. Why don’t magicians need massages?
Because they can poof away their stress!
46. How does a banker relax?
With a currency of knots removed!
47. What do you call a fussy eater getting a massage?
A picky relaxer!
48. What happens when you rub a snowman?
It turns into a puddle of relaxation!
49. Why did the computer book a massage?
It had too many tabs open!
50. How does a painter relax?
With some strokes of massage!
51. What was the ocean’s massage method?
Soothing waves!
52. What’s the difference between a bad joke and a massage?
One leaves you cringing, the other leaves you relaxed!
53. Why did the tomato see the masseuse?
It felt squashed!
54. What do you call a happy melon after a massage?
Relaxing in meloncholy!
55. How do you know if a masseuse is also a comedian?
Their puns are on point!
56. Why did the chair feel relaxed?
Because it was relieved of its seat!
57. What’s a dog’s preference for massage?
Treats included!
58. How do aliens stay stress-free?
By getting cosmic massages!
59. What’s a magician’s favorite massage move?
Abraca-relax!
60. Why don’t electrical appliances get massages?
They’re already well-charged!
61. How does a fish get a massage?
With seaweed wraps!
62. Why did the tree enjoy its massage?
It felt deeply rooted!
63. What does a lawyer call a great massage?
A legal knot-el!
64. Why don’t mimes need massages?
They’re good at silent gestures!
65. What’s the best massage for Aries?
Anything that’s full of energy!
Feeling relaxed and entertained: Share the joy!
Now that you’ve had a good laugh with these body massage jokes, why not spread the joy? Laughter is infectious, and a good joke is always welcome. Share these jokes with your friends, family, or even your favorite massage therapist to brighten their day.
Don’t forget to bookmark our website, jokeandpun.com, for even more laughter-filled content. Laughter is a gift worth sharing, and the world can always use more smiles and fun.
