For fans of the Ultimate Fighting Championship, the action inside the octagon is all about adrenaline, precision, and a whole lot of bruises. But whether you’re a seasoned spectator or a casual enthusiast, everyone can appreciate a good laugh to balance the intensity of those fierce fights. Did you know that the very first UFC event took place in 1993?
That’s over 30 years of spinning kicks, triumphant victories, and, of course, some legendary punchlines. Our handpicked selection of UFC jokes is sure to have you laughing as hard as you cheer. From puns to playful witticisms, these quips are just what you need to lighten up and share with friends.
So, without further ado, let’s dive into this arsenal of hilarity and see who delivers the funniest punchline of all!
Table of the Best UFC Jokes
1. Why don’t UFC fighters use bookmarks?
They prefer ground-and-pound techniques!
2. Why did the UFC fighter go to school?
He wanted to master the “rear-naked read.”
3. What’s a UFC fighter’s favorite game?
Rock, Paper, Scissors, Punch!
4. Why did the UFC fighter bring a ladder to the fight?
To ensure his opponent couldn’t take him down!
5. What do you call a UFC fighter who loves animals?
A brownbeltarian.
6. Why don’t UFC fighters ever get lost?
They lean on their “ground game”!
7. What do you get when you cross a UFC fighter with a snowstorm?
A blizzard in a triangle choke.
8. Why did the UFC fighter take up knitting?
So he could always have his “arm-bar” warm!
9. How do UFC fighters communicate with ghosts?
Through the spirit of Muay-Thai.
10. What kind of makeup do UFC fighters wear?
Knockout-blush.
11. Why do UFC fighters love math?
Because they always strive for a submission!
12. What’s a UFC fighter’s favorite sandwich?
Club Sub!
13. How do UFC fighters keep clean?
They “tap out” with soap!
14. Why did the UFC fighter sit on the clock?
To knock out the seconds!
15. What is a UFC fighter’s favorite type of humor?
Punch lines!
16. Why did the UFC coach go broke?
He kept losing his “rounds” of cash.
17. How do UFC fighters relax?
With some ground-and-chill.
18. Why did the UFC fighter start a garden?
To practice some “root work.”
19. What’s the favorite fruit of a UFC fighter?
Knock-out oranges.
20. Why do UFC fighters always carry a notebook?
To clinch those winning strategies.
21. What did the UFC ref say to the vegetable garden?
“Time to Veggie-tap!”
22. Why do UFC fighters love puzzles?
Because they always break the hold-fast!
23. What’s a UFC fighter’s favorite season?
Submission Summer.
24. Why was the UFC fighter writing on a balloon?
Practicing his air-jabs!
25. Why do UFC fighters shop at the outdoor market?
For the fresh “grappling”!
26. What’s a UFC fighter’s favorite food item?
Tapas!
27. How do UFC fighters make decisions?
They ground-and-pound the pros and cons.
28. Why don’t UFC fighters like Twitter?
Too many birds, not enough action.
29. What car does a UFC fighter drive?
A Honda (high londa)!
30. Why did the UFC fighter carry an umbrella?
To block those flying knees!
31. What kind of books do UFC fighters read?
Knock-your-self-out literature.
32. Why did the UFC fighter cross the road?
To get to the other fight!
33. What’s a UFC fighter’s favorite type of movie?
Action-packed jabs!
34. Why are UFC fighters good at betting?
Because they always have the upper hand.
35. How do you make a UFC fighter laugh?
By telling them punchlines!
36. Why did the UFC fighter bring string to the fight?
To tie up loose ends!
37. What’s a UFC fighter’s favorite board game?
Check-Mate!
38. Why did the UFC fighter’s computer keep freezing?
Too many knockout downloads.
39. Why don’t UFC fighters use elevators?
Too many submissions.
40. How do UFC fighters solve problems?
With a “rear-naked” solution!
41. What song do UFC fighters love to sing?
“Hit Me With Your Best Shot”!
42. Why did the UFC fighter join the debate team?
To add some punch to his arguments!
43. How do you compliment a UFC fighter?
Say they have a knock-out smile.
44. What do you call a lazy UFC fighter?
Mixed martial dazed.
45. Why did the UFC fighter bring a pillow to the fight?
To deliver a knockout.
46. What’s a UFC fighter’s favorite drink?
Punch!
47. Why did the UFC fighter take up painting?
For the perfect “jabstroke.”
48. How do you get a UFC fighter’s attention?
Yell, “Free Submission Class”!
49. Why are UFC fighters great team players?
Because they know how to “tap in.”
50. What’s a UFC fighter’s favorite day?
“Groundhog” day!
51. Why did the UFC fighter carry a flashlight?
To illuminate his shadowboxing.
52. Why did the UFC fighter apply to be a chef?
To take a jab at culinary arts.
53. How do UFC fighters handle defeat?
With a head held high and a knee to the canvas.
54. Why did the UFC fighter start a podcast?
To round-up his fans.
55. What’s a UFC fighter’s favorite gym equipment?
The bag – always ready to punch back!
## Enjoyed these UFC jokes?
We hope these hilarious UFC jokes had you in stitches faster than a lightning-fast takedown! If you had a good laugh, make sure to share this punchy humor with friends and fellow fight fans. Bookmark our website, Joke and Pun, for your instant dose of laughter whenever you need it, and keep the giggles rolling both inside and outside the octagon. Your support keeps us going, so spread the fun!
