In the heart of New England nestles a state that is made for amusement – Vermont, known for maple syrup, dairy farms, and the legendary Ben & Jerry’s, funny is almost part of its DNA. Whether you’re a Vermont local, a long-time tourist, or someone who can’t tell Vermont from Virginia, dive into this light-hearted look at the Green Mountain State with the best Vermont jokes that are sure to make you chuckle.
Table of the Best Vermont Jokes
1. Why don’t Vermonters ever play hide and seek?
Because nobody would even try to hide. They’re too busy watching the beautiful fall foliage!
2. How do you know a Vermont farmer is having an adventurous day?
His tractor GPS says he’s veered 5 feet from his normal path!
3. What do you call a snowstorm in Vermont?
Tuesday.
4. Why was the Vermont sugar maple upset?
It felt sapped.
5. What’s the Vermont state flower?
Flour. It’s everywhere in those famous bakeries!
6. Why did the Vermont dairy cow become a stand-up comedian?
Because she could milk a punchline!
7. How do Vermonters make their coffee?
Burr-latte. Yes, it’s that cold.
8. Why do Vermont ghosts haunt sugar houses?
They have a sweet tooth!
9. Why do Vermonters always carry a map?
Because you can’t trust a moose to give you directions!
10. What’s the best compliment you can give a Vermonter?
You’re sharper than cheddar.
11. How do Vermont squirrels tell their age?
They count their wrinkles… in their winter fur!
12. Why don’t basketball players like Vermont?
Too many rebounds… in the weather!
13. Why do Vermont chickens fly south for the winter?
Even they can’t stand the ice-cold syrup!
14. Why was the Vermont blizzard bad at chat?
It could only give cold shoulder, no small talk.
15. Why do fishermen love Vermont?
Because when the fish aren’t biting, they can at least enjoy the scenic mountains!
16. What do you call a bear in Burlington?
Lost!
17. Why did the Vermont bakery go broke?
Because their dough always ended up as ice buns!
18. How does a Vermont farmer find a lost cow?
Suddenly delicious Ben & Jerry’s ice cream flavors start popping up!
19. What’s a Vermonter’s favorite type of music?
Anything with a good BRRRrrrrr-eat!
20. Why don’t vampires like Vermont?
Too much garlic in Lake Champlain!
21. Why did the Vermonter carry a step ladder?
He was trying to touch the fall sky!
22. Why are Vermonters great at yoga?
Because they’re always bending over backward for maple syrup!
23. Who is Vermont’s favorite superhero?
Maple Syrup Man. Not all superheroes leap buildings – some just stick!
24. Why do Vermonters have big front porches?
So they can wave to their neighbors… in New Hampshire.
25. What’s a Vermonter’s favorite dance move?
The freeze.
26. How do you get a one-armed Vermonter out of a tree?
Wave.
27. Why do moose like Vermont?
They’ve heard the grass is greener on the other side!
28. How do Vermont cows stay warm in winter?
They put on their cow-l neck sweaters!
29. Why did the Vermont fish blush?
Because it saw the lake’s bottom.
30. Why did the Vermonter go to the bakery?
He kneaded some dough!
A Punchline Wrap-up
Well, there it is folks – our compilation of Vermont jokes guaranteed to make you crack a smile at least. Whether through the clever humorist twist on the state’s moose, the unexpected introspective look at our syrup-clad maples or the teasing nod to our good-natured farmers, we’ve laughed our way from Burlington to Brattleboro. So how about sharing this hearty dose of laughter?
Remember, laughter is contagious and something as simple as a Vermont joke can turn anyone’s day around. Whether you’re a Vermonter through and through or just passing by our great state, don’t forget to share the guffaws and keep the laughter rolling!
