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Home»Jokes»71 Hilarious Turkey Jokes to Gobble Up This Holiday Season
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71 Hilarious Turkey Jokes to Gobble Up This Holiday Season

Why did the turkey cross the road? You’ll just have to read on to find out!
Danny "D-Mac" McAllisterBy Danny "D-Mac" McAllister9 Mins Read
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Turkey Jokes to Gobble Up This Holiday Season
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Thanksgiving is just around the corner, and what better way to liven up your holiday than with some hilarious turkey jokes? Whether you’re cracking up the kids at the dinner table, entertaining relatives before the pumpkin pie, or simply looking for new material to share at Friendsgiving, these jokes are guaranteed to ruffle some feathers in the best way possible.

Fun fact: Did you know that Benjamin Franklin wanted the turkey, not the bald eagle, to be the national bird of the United States because of its “respectable” nature?

Seems like he had exquisite taste in both humor and poultry. So grab a drumstick, stuff yourself with laughter, and prepare to gobble up these witty bird-themed zingers!

Table of the Funniest Turkey Jokes

  • 1. Why did the turkey bring a microphone to dinner?
  • 2. What sound does a turkey’s phone make?
  • 3. Why don’t turkeys ever get into arguments?
  • 4. What’s a turkey’s favorite dessert?
  • 5. What did the turkey say to the side dish at the buffet?
  • 6. How do turkeys dance on Thanksgiving?
  • 7. Why did the turkey sit on the tom-tom drum?
  • 8. What does a turkey’s Facebook status say after Thanksgiving?
  • 9. How does a turkey send out invitations to dinner?
  • 10. What do you call a turkey that’s bad at sports?
  • 11. Why did the scarecrow win the turkey talent show?
  • 12. Why was the turkey a terrible comedian?
  • 13. Where do turkeys go to work out?
  • 14. How do you make a turkey float?
  • 15. What kind of music do turkeys love to listen to?
  • 16. Why don’t turkeys fly with the other birds?
  • 17. What’s a turkey’s favorite type of movie?
  • 18. Why couldn’t the turkey finish its Thanksgiving meal?
  • 19. What do turkeys say on rainy days?
  • 20. Why aren’t turkeys ever good math students?
  • 21. What’s a turkey’s favorite vacation spot?
  • 22. Why did the turkey join the Thanksgiving choir?
  • 23. How does a turkey apologize?
  • 24. What do you call a sassy turkey?
  • 25. Why did the turkey refuse seconds?
  • 26. What kind of cars do turkeys drive?
  • 27. What did one turkey text to the other?
  • 28. What sport do turkeys love the most?
  • 29. Why don’t turkeys go to the library?
  • 30. What’s a turkey’s favorite weather?
  • 31. How do turkeys feel after Thanksgiving day passes?
  • 32. Why are turkeys such social birds?
  • 33. Why don’t turkeys wear socks?
  • 34. What do turkeys do on their day off?
  • 35. Why did the turkey bring a pillow to dinner?
  • 36. What’s a turkey’s favorite mobile app?
  • 37. Why did the turkey get in trouble at school?
  • 38. What’s a turkey’s worst fear?
  • 39. What do turkeys say when they gossip?
  • 40. How do turkeys say goodbye to each other?
  • 41. What’s a turkey’s favorite clothing accessory?
  • 42. What books do turkeys like to read?
  • 43. What did the turkey tell the waiter?
  • 44. Why did the turkey blush?
  • 45. What’s a turkey’s favorite form of exercise?
  • 46. What’s a turkey’s least favorite dance?
  • 47. Why did the turkey wear sneakers?
  • 48. How do turkeys keep their feathers smooth?
  • 49. Why do turkeys love Thanksgiving leftovers?
  • 50. How does a turkey win a game of poker?
  • 51. What did the turkey say to its plate?
  • 52. Why did the turkey dance at the party?
  • 53. What advice do young turkeys always ignore?
  • 54. What do turkeys listen to at holiday celebrations?
  • 55. Why did the turkey enroll in cooking school?
  • 56. What’s a turkey’s favorite board game?
  • 57. Why do turkeys never tell secrets?
  • 58. What do turkeys use to surf the internet?
  • 59. How do turkeys celebrate their birthdays?
  • 60. Why did the turkey lose the race?
  • 61. What happens when turkeys overeat?
  • 62. What’s a turkey’s go-to dance move?
  • 63. Where do turkeys go to relax?
  • 64. What did the turkey say on its wedding day?
  • 65. Why are turkeys natural comedians?
  • 66. What’s a turkey’s go-to pickup line?
  • 67. How do turkeys win arguments?
  • 68. What did the turkey ask for on Black Friday?
  • 69. What do turkeys write in their diaries?
  • 70. How did the turkey feel after Thanksgiving?
  • 71. What’s the turkey’s motto during the holidays?

1. Why did the turkey bring a microphone to dinner?

Because it wanted to give a fowl performance.

2. What sound does a turkey’s phone make?

Wing-wing!

3. Why don’t turkeys ever get into arguments?

They don’t want to ruffle anyone’s feathers!

4. What’s a turkey’s favorite dessert?

Peach gobbler.

5. What did the turkey say to the side dish at the buffet?

Stop crowding me, you’re stuffing me into a corner!

6. How do turkeys dance on Thanksgiving?

With lots of drumsticks.

7. Why did the turkey sit on the tom-tom drum?

Because it had the best beat for a gobbler groove.

8. What does a turkey’s Facebook status say after Thanksgiving?

Feast mode: Deactivated.

9. How does a turkey send out invitations to dinner?

Through gobble mail.

10. What do you call a turkey that’s bad at sports?

Foul play in action.

11. Why did the scarecrow win the turkey talent show?

Because it was outstanding in its field.

12. Why was the turkey a terrible comedian?

It couldn’t deliver a proper punchline—it just kept winging it.

13. Where do turkeys go to work out?

At the gobble-gym.

14. How do you make a turkey float?

You add soda, ice cream, and a turkey feather.

15. What kind of music do turkeys love to listen to?

Stuffin’ grooves.

16. Why don’t turkeys fly with the other birds?

Because they take things way too personally!

17. What’s a turkey’s favorite type of movie?

Anything that’s stuffed with action.

18. Why couldn’t the turkey finish its Thanksgiving meal?

It was already stuffed!

19. What do turkeys say on rainy days?

This weather is totally fowl!

20. Why aren’t turkeys ever good math students?

Because they always wing it instead of studying.

21. What’s a turkey’s favorite vacation spot?

Turkey! Where else?

22. Why did the turkey join the Thanksgiving choir?

It wanted to gobble in perfect harmony.

23. How does a turkey apologize?

With a heartfelt drumstick gesture.

24. What do you call a sassy turkey?

A diva in feathers.

25. Why did the turkey refuse seconds?

Because it quit cold turkey!

26. What kind of cars do turkeys drive?

Gobble-mobiles.

27. What did one turkey text to the other?

Can’t talk now—I’m totally roasted!

28. What sport do turkeys love the most?

Featherweight boxing.

29. Why don’t turkeys go to the library?

They don’t want to ruffle the pages.

30. What’s a turkey’s favorite weather?

Anything with a slight gravy drizzle.

31. How do turkeys feel after Thanksgiving day passes?

Relieved and grateful to be forgotten.

32. Why are turkeys such social birds?

They love talking turkey with their flock!

33. Why don’t turkeys wear socks?

Because they have claw-some talons.

34. What do turkeys do on their day off?

They just wing it.

35. Why did the turkey bring a pillow to dinner?

It wanted to be stuffed and comfy.

36. What’s a turkey’s favorite mobile app?

Stuffr.

37. Why did the turkey get in trouble at school?

It couldn’t stop trying to gobble up all the attention.

38. What’s a turkey’s worst fear?

The gravy train running out.

39. What do turkeys say when they gossip?

Don’t quote me on this, but I heard it on the gobblevine.

40. How do turkeys say goodbye to each other?

Catch you later, gobbler-gator!

41. What’s a turkey’s favorite clothing accessory?

A scarf because it keeps the neck warm.

42. What books do turkeys like to read?

Feathered thrillers.

43. What did the turkey tell the waiter?

Put the check on my tab.

44. Why did the turkey blush?

Because it saw the stuffing!

45. What’s a turkey’s favorite form of exercise?

Squats—because they already run the stairs anyway.

46. What’s a turkey’s least favorite dance?

The Hokey Pokey—it makes them turn around too much!

47. Why did the turkey wear sneakers?

So it could run away from Thanksgiving dinner in style.

48. How do turkeys keep their feathers smooth?

Plenty of feather conditioner.

49. Why do turkeys love Thanksgiving leftovers?

Because they’re all about that baste.

50. How does a turkey win a game of poker?

It always plays its wing cards close to its beak.

51. What did the turkey say to its plate?

We belong together.

52. Why did the turkey dance at the party?

To get into the Thanksgiving spirit.

53. What advice do young turkeys always ignore?

Don’t stick your neck out.

54. What do turkeys listen to at holiday celebrations?

Gobbly oldies.

55. Why did the turkey enroll in cooking school?

It wanted to better appreciate how it’s being prepared.

56. What’s a turkey’s favorite board game?

Stuffoply.

57. Why do turkeys never tell secrets?

They don’t want anything to leak out of the turkey baster!

58. What do turkeys use to surf the internet?

Google Gobble.

59. How do turkeys celebrate their birthdays?

With cranberry cake and gravy balloons.

60. Why did the turkey lose the race?

Because its legs were pie-tired.

61. What happens when turkeys overeat?

They fall right into trypto-fan mode!

62. What’s a turkey’s go-to dance move?

The Turkey Trot.

63. Where do turkeys go to relax?

The spa-ltry.

64. What did the turkey say on its wedding day?

I’m poultry in love.

65. Why are turkeys natural comedians?

Because they always crack up an audience.

66. What’s a turkey’s go-to pickup line?

You’ve got me gravying for more!

67. How do turkeys win arguments?

With strong points from their wishbone.

68. What did the turkey ask for on Black Friday?

A lifetime supply of stuffing—it’s a real deal.

69. What do turkeys write in their diaries?

“Just winging it again today.”

70. How did the turkey feel after Thanksgiving?

Absolutely roasted.

71. What’s the turkey’s motto during the holidays?

Live, laugh, gobble.

Share the laughs, spread the gobbles!

Looking for a way to serve smiles alongside your mashed potatoes? Let these turkey jokes be your secret ingredient this holiday season! Bookmark this page for guaranteed giggles and be sure to share it with your flock—whether it’s your family, friends, or even your online followers. After all, laughter brings everyone closer, no carving knife needed!

Disclaimer: The jokes and puns featured on this website are intended for entertainment purposes only. While we may include content from the public domain, we also hold copyright to the original material we’ve created. If you believe that any content on this website infringes upon your copyright, please contact us immediately. We take copyright infringement seriously and will take appropriate action. While we strive for accuracy, we cannot guarantee the absolute correctness or completeness of all information presented here. Reader discretion is advised. Enjoy the laughs!
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